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oh_yoko
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I want everyone I love to live in Pittsburgh. |
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I hate having to do college classes... I guess it's not that bad, really it doesn't take too long but it is hard to keep track of everything I have to do. Huge text message fight with mcd. constant barrage of texts from evan for the past few days and I think he is going to send me flowers in the mail and a polaroid of himself. I guess I should have known months ago it was over with mcd, he said it didn't have to be until I slept with bj, but I am human and a young girl and I am not the kind of girl who is fine with being celibate for a year, sitting around waiting for something that might not happen. It's the saddest fucking thing in the world, but it's true. It fucking sucks so bad and I have been trying and hoping that it would change, but I guess that there are some things you can't change no matter how bad they are. You just have to accept it and deal with it no matter how badly you don't want it to be the truth. wish I didn't have so many responsibilities, wish I could just work and chill and work on my book. but instead I also have to worry about tons of money, school, getting into the art institute and somehow funding that. but if I do get in it will be a nice structure, I think, despite the fact that I'm always worried about money. hope I get a job soon. i am good at cutting people out of my life and never thinking about them again. it is sad sometimes, to lose someone, but sometimes I have messed things up so badly that I can't really keep up a cordial relationship. So I just cut them out and try to forget anything ever happened. It sucks a lot sometimes but I fuck up far too often to have any choice. |
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and something like three months into our freshman year, my friends and i had the oakland party scene down. we had seen it all. some of the boys friends from highschool who had stayed hometown came to spend the weekend with us. we didn't particularly like them but they wanted a tour of the big city. a three day sample of how we spent our everyday. we took them to a party held in someone's basement in south oakland and they got spooked when they walked in on a naked couple snorting lines in the bathroom. a little later on, a gun was fired into the side of a police car. they were scandalized; we laughed it off. nothing shocking. Later though, I overheard one of the boys (so unremarkable that I can't remember his name now, and I went to school with him and others like him for six years. I think everyone called him some ethnic slur. Wop? Gook? No, those were two different boys...) Any way, I overheard him say to another boy, "Never again, man. Did you see that hookie thing? I've never even heard of that! Next thing you know they'll be doing crystal meth. They're crazy!" holding hookah hoses in the next room, we stifled raucous laughter and knew that we had won. We had fought our way out of fucking flood city and emerged victorious, dripping with joie de vivre and a higher understanding of what it means to be truly alive. |
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would be investing in something that's going to give back to the community immeasurably. in more ways than just cashflow... will give pittsburgh a better, truer image the world over. support the soup kitchen, homeless shelter. we will donate -- but more than just donate, we will encourage others to get involved and help out, too. not just giving money we'll raise, bring attention to causes. in the age of youtube, we'll post daily blogs letting people know whats going on at the rabbit hole and all over the city. we'll raise awareness about worthy causes and spread a positive message the organization everything moves puts out books and cds. this is what we want to do for pittsburgh.
were models in daughters and sons by olivia locher when's the last time you saw a lemonade stand on fifth avenue? we would have one. and the sign would say, lemonade $1 donation to the women's help center. |
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an important point is that we will always be interacting with the community -- encouraging kids to create, to be involved, and make a positive change in pittsburgh and the world is it an odd hour? ring the bell. we're never closed.
if our friends need a place to stay they can stay at the rabbit hole also a crowd of kids in phoenix heard a song about me. |
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"I HAVE A CAT!? ...What the fuck are you doing here?... you asshole. That cat makes me wanna die!"
Life as modern art: living in a storefront.
get coroporate sponsors and put up crazy ads for them
set easels up once a week and paint watercolors
hang shoes from the ceiling.
"most underrated city" - ellen paige
"most livable city" - gallup polls
so why do people still think of pittsburgh as a smoky, dirty industrial town with nothing to offer to anyone but steelworkers? why don't people see it as the thriving community of artists and musicians that it is? This project will draw tons of press to Pittsburgh & show everyone in the world that there is art here, and life, and ideas. Help us make this fantastic dream a reality and put Pittsburgh on the map as what it really is once and for all.
once a week, set up tables and have like three pots of coffee brewing, and a big jug of milk and a bag of sugar and put up a sign that says FREE COFFEE. On another day of the week, make a ton of cookies and hand them out. On both of these days, we'll have a box for donations that people can fill if they want to. maybe have that money go to aid in darfur, or the homeless shelter in pittsburgh.
talk shows, perez, the news
my book in the window and hella, and maybe jacob and olivia's books.
on free coffee day, have my guitar and lele's ukelele out, and put up a big song that says "Play us a song!"
sell paintings, art, clothes.
have special guests, like a caricaturist who will draw for donations
"we're way cooler than that Chocolate rain video."
"lele is almost perfect."
"belle is almost perfect."
daily quotes in the window: haikus! silly fortune cookies, the quote about an endless summer. excerpts from books.
when we make up the proposal, scout out locations and make a chart of locations, rent, square footage, average utilities.
but we won't only be bringing positive attention to pittsburgh from people on the outside; we'll also benefit the city directly in a number of ways. we would raise money for pittsburgh soup kitchens, battered women's shelter. and raise awareness of these causes and encourage kids to volunteer and make a positive difference in their city. on some days when lele and are volunteering, we'll put a sign up in the window that says, "Out volunteering! You can make a positive difference too! Here's how..."
we have SO MUCH PASSION FOR THIS PROJECT.
we'll also give the city life a kick by putting up flyers for local shows and exhibits at smaller art museums, like Future Tenant. and get the message out about other cultural events. get kids excited about accomplishing things in their lives.
some days just wear a bathing suit and tights to read or watch a movie.
"Hey, you guys wanna come watch a movie?" to people watching.
sound classy in the proposal.
would potentially be the most productive and stimulating storefront in oakland.
have a bug chalkboard and sidewalk chalk
one time lele spent 45 minutes opening a pickle jar because she wanted to prove that she was independent
we can "live" and keep bedrooms upstairs for technical/legal reasons
we will meet so many people, so many people will know who we are. always have friends over.
call it an "art museum" not a residence
coming into our home is like plunging headlong down the rabbit hole
we don't go to parties -- the parties come to us.
lele and belle: creating something out of almost nothing
occaisionally put signs that say, "hey mary-kate!" "hey paris, call us! let's hang out." or, "lindsay, we love you!"
send perez a bunch of tips on the days that we have the "Hey perez!" sign up. he'll love to support pittsburgh. tell him why he should.
get help and advice on writing a proposal and all the legal aspects
do a photoshoot with people on the street, have a good camera and 4x6 printer
run a webpage and put the photos up
we'll put local artists work on the walls
put our videos on the website, we'll be a sensation
sell mine and lele's books on the website
this is how to give fate a nudge
do it in spring so there are a lot of college kids there.
when we send in the proposal, there will be a polaroid of lele and a polaroid of me, and the captions will say, "I'm Lele." "and I'm Belle."
and on the page underneath it will say, something like "and we have a plan to put pittsburgh on the map."
with the proposal send in our artist portfolios, including lele's photos!
say how many kids have my book
sell ourselves!
maybe I will have my installation in Future Tenant by then
metion how wildy popular the Tom Museum was and the 5 cent coffee shop
in an era where everyone's guilty pleasure is reality tv, what could be more compelling than watching the young lives of two city girls unfold right before your eyes? In real time, in real life?
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I know you'll see
Somehow the world will change for me
And be so wonderful
Live life, breathe air
I know somehow we're gonna get there
and feel so wonderful
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"Dude, I don't know... I don't fuckin' know, what I am trying to say to you right now, but what I am trying to express is that... I am always in party mode."
-- leslie |
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I made two really good decisions -- subscribing to netflix, and teaching myself how to burn DVDs.
since I subscribed to netflix, I've seen
Alice, Shortbus, Paprika, the first season of Arrested Development, 24 hour party people, in the realms of the unreal, paris je t'aime, and a clockwork orange.
and right now I have more than 100 films in my queue waiting to be sent to me one by one.
And I burn every one I get! It's not as simple as burning a cd, so I guess that's why more people don't do it. You have to use two different programs (and decode and compress and encode the movie...) but I'll confess I still don't fully understand it. There are so many options and steps that I don't know what the hell they are. For the most part I just figured it out as I went along and used whichever buttons seemed to make sense. anyway I have it down to an art now.
by the time the summer is up in Pittsburgh Maria and I will have a huge binder full of movies sitting next to our tv to choose from!
It will be such a good collection!
COLLECTION! holy shit! there I go again, collecting beautiful things! books, songs, clothes, and now movies!
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for months leslie and i talked about living together. she would always say, "You're living with me, right? I mean, you don't have a choice. You are whether you want to or not." But then suddenly she stopped saying it and I found out later it was because she found out rent would go up a considerable amount if a third person lived in their house. So I thought living with her wasn't an option anymore.
I thought about living with Roxanne and Michael until today when Rox told me in an email that she and michael decided to live just the two of them. I panicked. Now what was I going to do? I thought leslie and her mom were worried about getting in trouble if their landlord found out a third person was living there, so I didn't think i could stay there longer than the summer.
Then it occured to me to ask how much leslie's rent would go up if I were on the lease. and she said $350. Well, that would still be cheaper than living on my own. So I talked to Leslie and I think what we'll do is I'll live there incognito for the summer, and if it looks like it's going to be a problem we'll just put me on the lease and I'll pay how much the rent goes up.
crisis averted
life stabilized
I hope maria still wants me to live with her as much as she did before. I would be such a good roommate to her. It would be fuckin' wonderful. Goddamn, pretty soon my life should be back on track and I will feel like I am living the life I am supposed to be living again. |
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